yeah! my pimple has finally become smaller. all thanks to zhenqi's pimple cream. she is so niceee to lend me her pimple cream yesterday. haha... thanks alot, girl. hehe...today, was supposed to stay at home whole day but last minute, went out to meet huiyun and gen for a bubble tea drink. hmm...tried out the mint chocolate flavour but i can't really taste out the mint, there was only the chocolate taste. so after drinking, chatted about how we have been recently and also the chalet thingy that have been pestponed and then went over to mac cos there was really no where to walk around. sat there and huiyun used gen's lappy to help her with the updates. so, i sat there watching the show 'liao zai' since they was broadcasting it in the tv. sat there for about 45 mins and we went home. brought mooncake home today cos huiyun passed each of us a pack of snow skin mooncake that she and her mom have made.haha...tasted really nice! never tried eating home-made mooncake before...wahahaha...thanks thanks...
i am just so sick and tired of guessing what people are feeling. it is just so hard to understand them. why am i always the one trying to guess wat people are feeling? i really, really hate this kind of feeling that i am having now.
"AS LONG AS YOU BELIEVE, YOU WILL SEE THE GREEN LIGHT HAPPINESS!!"
10:42 PM
Thursday, September 28, 2006
i like being in my dreamland...
haha...went back school for rehearsal until 10+... omg! i am feeling so tired now. played on stage 3 times and the feeling that i am having now is so nervous and at times i can feel that my hand is shaking. haiz...have to control myself more if not i am going to embarass myself during the actual day.haha...can't imagine what will i be feeling when there are audiences on the actual day. tomorrow's plan(oops...or should i say later on's plan since it's past 12! haha) will be to meet huiyun and zhenqi to find the paint for the family concert decorations. hmm..going to plaza singapura and i can get to eat BK's breakfast! haha....YEAH! long time never eat le. can predict that it will be a long tiring day cos after getting the paint, have to head back to school for practice and after that have to start the deco thingy. don't know can tahan anot..haha...OMG! the time now is 1.16am.it took me abt 30 mins to blog such a short post.haha... better go sleep now. shall blog again later when i am back from school..hahaha...
"LIFE IS A JOURNEY AND IT CAN TAKE US TO ANYWHERE WE CHOOSE TO GO..."
________________________________________________
trust the voice within...
haha...my 2nd entry of the day. went school for practice but before that, went PS to look for some glow in the dark spray for the deco. i think that we are seriously so unlucky cos we actually thought that we could get it from the spotlight but when we went there, the section that sells spray was closed cos they was doing some floor renovation and we couldn't cross over to get it. so we asked the sales assistant and she told us that it was out of stock and we was like 'OMG!' cos we was sort of carrying high hopes that we could get it there... so after that, we went down to carrefour to find but also don't have but the person told us that centerpoint have one D.I.Y shop that might have sell spray. we walked there for about 10mins and also took the chance to shop around.LOL... after reaching there, we went into the shop but then couldn't find the right spray. so we walked down again to taka's art friend to find the spray and we bought 4 sprays back. omg...all the walking is making my leg aching. hope that the deco will be a success! haha... back to the practice, was quite messy cos last minute we was taught more different way to play the finger exercise. haiz...so difficult to cope with it and timothy said that the teacher that will be coming on sat is very particular about the finger exercise. arghhhh...i really have difficulty playing it cos i will always be losing counts of the number of notes. just pray hard that everything will goes well on sat...
haha...just recall that something funny happen to me just now. went to photocopy scores with huiyun at tampines interchange. so after photocopying, i heard the person said $13.30 and i was like thinking eh, how come so expensive. but then i never think much and blur blur take out $13.30 to pay the cashier. then the cashier said "why u take so much money out? only $1.30 ma..." then i was like OMG! i am so blur...haha...don't know why was in a blur mood just now...wahahaha...thinking of it was really so funny lah...photocopy a few piece of paper can cost $13.30. haha...the person told me u thought gold paper ar...LOL!
"HOW GOOD WOULD IT BE IF SOME PART OF OUR MEMORIES IS WASHED AWAY..."
12:51 AM
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
i am dying soon!!
back home from chalet. hmm...first day actually nothing much to do.went there then watched tv, played card game 'heart attack' for a while and then went over to bedok sheng siong supermarket to help buy the stuffs for tomorrow's bbq. the trip to sheng siong is so terrible. we took cab there and i was having car sick and then the uncle still go the long way making me feel so nauseous. actually decide to go giant one but then end up change place and the cab driver don't know where is the place and he even asked eileen to help him find the place in the map.LOL!! so funny lah. then tinghui,ivan and jason who was in the other cab, ended up in bedok interchange and tinghui and jason have to take cab again to find us but they was taken to another supermarket and they have to walk quite long to find us. feel quite guilty cos tinghui was having fever and she still have to walk a long distance there. should have take the cab with her. but also no use cos i also don't know which is the actual sheng siong that we are going..LOL!! so after shopping for the bbq stuffs, tinghui, carol, suetni and jason went back to chalet and i took cab with eileen home but in the end, we went to tampines mall to eat mac..haha...so full now!!
OMG! i am feeling totally sian off now..casilda told me that there will be practice also on sat which means that i have to go back school for 3 days. arghhh...i feel like dying now. one thing is i don't know why i am feeling so scare of the instructor when i have not seen him before...wahahaha... is it because i am thinking too much already?? or is it because i have no confidence in me playing well?? arghhhh....have to tell myself to relax more!! hahaha...
haiz...it's so weird when things are working in the opposite way for me. everything is just not working in the right way...why, why, why??
"THE WORDS THAT APPEAR IN MY MIND MOST OF THE TIME IS GUILTY AND REGRET..."
11:35 PM
Monday, September 25, 2006
i am so bored now... haha...stay at home again! nothing much to do except watching lotsa of tv. hahaha... but manage to arrange my photos in the photo album that i have bought yesterday and also practice violin for a little while... after that was tv,tv and tv. OMG! holidays are coming to an end but i still don't feel that i am having holiday now.. haiz..why must time pass so fast? or am i just not cherishing the time that i am having during the past few weeks of holiday?? but learning to cherish is just so difficult cos once you have learn to cherish it, it would have disappear...
why am i in my lala land most of the time? haha...always dreaming of a lot of things. but then the things that i have dreamt have never ever come true. things are always going in the opposite way for me. when the dreams that i want it to come true it won't come true. but then the dreams that i have never ever dream of, it will come true. it's so weird in life.hahaha...
"'CAUSE YOU'LL BE IN MY HEART, FROM THIS DAY ON NOW AND FOREVER!!"
10:24 PM
Sunday, September 24, 2006
wahahaha... today and yesterday was so boring!! whole day staying at home rotting. haha... watching tv is still the best way to kill boredom. yesterday don't know why was totally moodless. the whole day feeling so sad and lifeless but i have found a way to cure my moodiness which is to listen to many,many songs. haha.. i really like fish leong alot cos listening to her songs can really make me feel better. so thursday and friday, went back to school for practice. it was tiring but fun with the company of the others members.hahaha... next tue will be the class chalet! but eh, the mood of going for chalet is not here yet. am i looking forward for it anot? i also don't know yet.. haha...
If you were all alone in the universe with no one to talk to, no one with which to share the beauty of the stars, to laugh with, what would be your purpose in life? It is other life, it is love, which gives your life meaning. This is harmony. We must discover the joy of each other, the joy of challenge, the joy of growth.
"MAYBE WE ARE PEOPLE FROM TWO DIFFERENT WORLDS!!"
12:48 PM
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
arghhh... my neck is aching so much. don't know is it because of my wrong sleeping position that when i woke up this morning, i have difficulty turning my neck to the left. it was so painful that i almost cried but now it's slightly ok. i can turn my head abit to the left but the pain is still there.haiz...why must it be today?haha...so ya, today finally went to the boardgame cafe at katong with huiyun, suzanne and shi juan and it's so fun. there was so many selection of games for us to choose and most of the games there i have not play before. but there was helpers teaching us to play the games and in total, we played about 5games? or more? haha...i also forgot about it. in total, we played for 5hrs spending $14.40 for the foods,drinks and the playing of games. i want to go again! wahhaha...
reflection
look at me you may think you see who i really am but you'll never know me every day it's as if i play a part now i see if i wear a mask i can fool the world but i cannot fool my heart who is that girl i see staring straight back at me? when will my reflection show who i am inside? i am now in a world where i have to hide my heart and what i believe in but somehow i will show the world what's inside my heart and be loved for who i am who is that girl i see staring straight back at me? why is my reflection someone i don't know? must i pretend that i'm someone else for all time? when will my reflection show who i am inside? there's a heart that must be free to fly that burns with a need to know the reason why why must we all conceal what we think how we feel? must there be a secret me i'm forced to hide? i won't pretend that i'm someone else for all time when will my reflection show who i am inside? when will my reflection show who i am inside?
like this song alot so just feel like posting the lyrics here...hahaha...
"SOME DREAMS ARE JUST SO HARD TO COME TRUE!"
10:09 PM
Sunday, September 17, 2006
yippieeee... haha...nothing much happen recently so didn't blog for these few days. friday got back my exam results! eh...not disappointed with it but then still have to work harder. yesterday, went out with huiyun and suzanne to play bowling..omg!the price is so expensive.1 game cost $3.80 and we really spent alot there cos we also played pool. hahaha... after that, we went home at abt 4+pm and then went to bedok hawker centre to eat with my family.haha...the food there was nice and i simply love the barbequed chicken wings.the atmopsphere there was somehow the same as lau pa sat except that yesterday was drizzling a little so no one was sitting outside. wahahaha...i am eating so much! this morning, went out to have breakfast cum lunch cos my brother's football practice ended at 11+ so we waited for him before going to eat.. after that,went liang court to shop around and time passed really fast and the whole afternoon is starting to end.
finally watched finish the uploaded videos of wei xiao pasta and i must say that zhang dong liang is so handsome.haha...so crazy over him now..LOL!! but too bad the full epi of the drama is not out yet. have to wait for the rest to be uploaded. so now i am gonna watch tokyo juliet. think should also be nice..
"WHY MUST WE ALL CONCEAL WHAT WE THINK AND HOW WE FEEL? MUST THERE BE A SECRET ME?"
8:12 PM
Thursday, September 14, 2006
hahas... have been going out too often during this few days. i want to spend more time at home but just can't help it..haha... yesterday, went back to school to help up with the family concert decorations.have not finish the decorations yet but we managed to complete most of it in abt 3hrs. haha...tat's all because we have huiyun who was our artist.LOL! she did most of the drawings and it was really nice... so today, went back to school for violin practice for 4 hrs but it ended abit early cos we find excuses that we have to go home early...hahaha...still can't play really well! guess have to practice more... OMG! tomorrow is the day cos the exam results will be out.i am so scare and they are saying that smses of our results will be sent to us early in the morning.HUH...arghhh...then i have to wake up early to check my results already...just checked the timetable for next sem and my IS is in the afternoon...OMG! i am really worried cos all the pple that i will be seeing in the class will be different. haiz...just thinking of this makes me feel like dying.hahaha...just hope that i will not be hating this module at all...
tomorrow will not be going out..plan to watch dramas in youtube.there is alot of dramas that i want to watch..haha....there is wei xiao pasta, tokyo juliet, swing girls(yet to watch finish some parts) and life made simple.haha...dun know how long it will get me to finish watching all.
"THERE IS ALOT OF CHOICES IN LIFE BUT IT IS JUST A MATTER OF WHAT WE HAVE CHOSE!"
9:30 PM
Monday, September 11, 2006
arghhh... i am getting real bek chey now!! i can't sign in into msn despite trying for a lot of times. hope that it is not because my laptop is having some problem...haiz...everything seems to oppose me...nothing goes right for me. so today, went swimming in the morning with huiyun and badminton during the afternoon with huiyun, shijuan and eileen. hope that i did lose some weight...haha...have to lose the weights that i have gained during the past few days. but i am just wondering how are we going to lose weight especially when there is food temptation everywhere after exercising...hahaha...we just love foods!! tomorrow, we will be going through the same routine as today which is to swim and play badminton...haha...people might think that we are crazy but then it is also a good way for us to destress...
i just don't understand why are things in a mess when it is happening on me. i am like not able to handle small problems which can be solve easily. people tend to say that it is important to stay calm when problems happen and i always believe that it is true.but when problems really exist, i find it really hard to stay calm. at times, i really find that i am thinking in a complicated way and that's why i am always having worries. i always tend to think in a negative way and make myself become so stress up. i am so scared that i will end up getting depression one day.hahaha...
'DO I REALLY LOVE MYSELF?' this is the question that i have been asking myself recently. the truth is at times i don't really love myself. i also don't know why but i just feel that i am a bad person doing all those bad things. this is just the feeling that i am having.. i am just some irresponsible person.
"AM I CARING FOR OTHERS OR JUST FOR MYSELF?"
9:07 PM
Saturday, September 09, 2006
YEAH!! back from malacca and i must say that it is real fun.haha... but the time spend there is really short. how i wish that i can be there for longer times. didn't manage to take any photos as i lost my camera during the previous trip to kuala lumpur..haiz...what a pity! haha... so went there for two days and i ate alot.. gained a few pounds already..hahaha...but guess dad has spend alot of money there cos we are always asking for money to buy things but no choice cos this is what a holiday should be like...LOL!!i just love going malaysia! LOL...
today, went out with the moviefreaks...haha...ate a lot! omg, we are always eating during every outing...but i enjoy it!hahaha...so in the morning, meet huiyun and shijuan first for swimming. after that, meet suzanne to eat lunch and we used a long time deciding where to go to eat.in the end, we ate delifrance and i just love the eggs..haha... so after eating, we went shopping around around tampines mall and century square and it is making me so tired cos no money means nothing to shop for. haha...then went bugis to meet gen and we were off to our dinner at lau pa sat and we was like eating so many foods.haha...we ordered satay, chicken wing and o-lua(some kind of oysters thingy) but then nobody dares to eat oyster, so in the end, i was the one eating most of the oysters with the help of suzanne...haha...just pray hard that i won't have stomachache tml..hahaha...
"HOW GOOD WOULD IT BE IF HAPPINESS IS THERE FOR US FOREVER!"
10:58 PM
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
woolala...haha... today went back to school alone to pass up the giro form...the trip back to school was real boring cos the there was no one to talk...i took 1 hour plus to travel to school but then the time that i spend in school was barely less than 15 mins... haiz...wasted my transport fee. so after leaving school, take train again to bugis to meet zhenqi and lineng for the family concert decorations.haha...we laughed until siao while discussing or i should say that only zhenqi and me was laughing most of the time...hahaha...we took only 1 hour plus to discuss and after that went shopping with zhenqi...but then money is always the problem that makes shopping so hard cos cannot buy anything..haha...
i hate being alone and i have to learn to be independent...that's the conclusion that i have got when i was doing some self-reflection yesterday...it seems like i have been depending on friends too much already....it's nice to have friends to be dependent on but then sometimes i must also be use to doing things alone...
YEAH!! tomorrow going malaysia already...haha...hope time don't pass so fast when i am there...let the time slow down or stops when i am there...haha...what crazy craps am i talking...LOL! think i am going crazy soon...haha...omg! haven started packing my bag yet...guess later have to sleep late to pack up...hehe...
"WHY IS LETTING GO SO DIFFICULT?"
8:57 PM
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
fun kbox outing!hahaha....
what a boring day~~ today stayed at home for the whole day and there is nothing for me to do. haiz..but better enjoy the days that i am staying at home lest i will regret it when school reopens.tomorrow might be a busy day for me cos i have promised to help zhenqi up with the family concert decorations..have to meet them 2pm at bugis mrt station to find materials. but before that have to go back to school to pass up the giro form.it's so mafan! hahaha...omg! still have not decided what time i have to leave house tomorrow..haha...that's the problem with poor time management cos you won't ever know what is the actual time that you have to leave house and especially when you have to travel so far...haha...later have to ask friends again!hehehe...
why am i always doing things that i am regretting?? why can't the decision that i have made work out for me?? haiz...i am always making decisions so fast without giving it a second thought.that's why i am always regretting!
i can't wait for the malaysia trip! 1 and a half more days to go and i will be in malacca...hahaha...YEAH!! looking forward to it for so long already... it's the time to spend more time with my family and the time for me to enjoy..i am not finding the country bored though i have been there for ample times already..hehe...
"HUMANS ARE NOT PERFECTIONIST BUT WHY DO PEOPLE STILL EXPECT SO MUCH FROM THEM??"
1:07 PM
Monday, September 04, 2006
YEAH!! this morning went kbox with the moviefreaks...it was fun and we sang alot...haha...unfortunately, gen can't join us cos she have school in the morning..but nvm, cos there will still be a next time!hehe...after singing, we went to marine parade to shop and i must say that the shopping centre is real big.we shopped until siao...hahaha...after that, went home taking 15 and we was so crazy in the bus..laughing non-stop especially when suzanne and shijuan always argue..haha! but it was a wonderful day...hehe!
oh ya..congrats to huiyun and eileen cos they got jobs already =) haiz...i also want to work but my malaysia trip is blocking the dates!!arghhh...so many people are working now and i feel like a lazy pig not working at all..hahaha...
it seems like i have been posting a lot of sad posts recently...haha...but dun ever think that i am going to say about happy feelings today cos there is really nothing that is making me feel happy recently...i just find it so hard to express words to people! they either don't understand what i am saying or they are just feeling that i am saying something sarcastic when i am actually not...haiz...why is living so hard?
"LIFE IS NEVER EVER FAIR ESPECIALLY WHEN PEOPLE ARE TREATED IN DIFFERENT WAYS!!"
10:09 PM
Saturday, September 02, 2006
today was a fun day! haha... this afternoon, went to pasir ris park to cycle with suzanne, huiyun and shijuan...meet suzanne to have lunch first because shijuan and huiyun intend to cycle to the park,so me and suzanne have to meet first to travel by bus to the park. we had japanese food at whitesands foodcourt and it taste really nice..after eating, we waited for a long time for huiyun and shijuan to reach but then we waited until so sian so we decided to go play bowling first at downtown east. but when we reach downtown, we found out that the bowling centre has close due to some renovation so no choice but to wait for shijuan and huiyun at the bus stop..after they reach, we went to rent bicycle for 2 hours costing us $10 but it was fun! so after cycling, shijuan and huiyun cycle back home and suzanne and i went to take train back..
i really don't know how should i view life.. sometimes,just feel that life isn't going the way that it should goes...maybe the way that i am viewing life now is in the wrong way! haiz...why is life so vex? having to think of so many things everyday...
"MAYBE IT IS BETTER TO LET GO! ALTHOUGH IT MIGHT BE HARD BUT TIME WILL SLOWLY LET EVERYTHING FADE AWAY..."
